Some days just suck 💜

Dear Mum

It’s been a while since I last wrote, it has been a hard few months, a different hard to the first three months without you. It’s hard watching life go on around you when you are still completely broken inside. I often wonder how it could possibly be more than 7 months since we lost you. It feels like only yesterday when a stranger rang with news that would shatter my world but it feels like an eternity since I heard you answer the phone with ‘Hello Love’.

Life is full of ‘firsts’ and ‘different’ hards!

This is just a different hard from the other hards! It’s Ollie’s Birthday today, and it sucks so much that you are not here to celebrate. Your grandchildren meant the world to you. The twins and I are heading to Adelaide tomorrow to celebrate with the little man, you won’t be there to celebrate with us but I know we will all be thinking of you.

It will be good to see them all, as life got in the way and we didn’t make it back after Christmas but it’s also hard as we wont see you!

I am dreading tomorrow as well. It’s the day I have to pack up your bedroom; it is so final, I’m not even sure I can do it. I don’t want to pack it up, packing it up has so many connotations attached to it, none of which I like. After tomorrow, I don’t think I will ever return to Oakden.

The photo below is one I took the other morning while walking Harvey. You would have loved our little fur baby. He is adorable. I often sit at the bench in the photo, with Harvey and think of you. I remember the day we walked down to the waterfront just after we moved in (it was October of 2020 - the borders must have been open briefly), and I sat on this bench with you, the only bench I have ever sat on in Breakfast Point and I am pleased it was with you. It’s a happy place, a place I go to when I just want to think or have a break from the world.

I miss you so much, Mum.

I Love You 💜

Matt